Damian Lillard has been playing like a mad person. He is proving to be one of the best point guards in the NBA and now, during the playoffs, he is showing his unbelievable star potential. His Portland Trailblazers just defeated the favorited Houston Rockets in the first round and it’s all thanks to his clutch performances. The games were intense and competitive, but it was Damian Lillard’s buzzer beater 3 point shot with 0.9 seconds left in game 6 that sent the Rockets packing. Everyone in the Moda Center went crazy, especially Lillard himself.
Once Lillard hit the series-winning shot, he looked as if he was starting to go haywire. And he was. Soon enough he started to twitch and shake frantically. His teammates looked concerned and although the moment was supposed to be a happy one, it turned very quickly into a horrifyingly shocking situation. “He hit the shot and we were all fired up. I couldn’t believe that we just won, but then something was off about Damian” teammate Robin Lopez stated.
The star point guard started to quickly make his way to the locker room, but it was Houston Rockets forward Chandler Parsons that revealed the truth about Lillard before he could get away from the spotlight. Parsons tackled Lillard and started pulling at Lillard’s skin until he felt it tear. Fans, players, and coaches all looked terrified as Chandler Parsons stood in the Moda Center holding half of Damian’s face. However, it wasn’t real skin. It was synthetic. And when Lillard stood up to defend himself, he revealed that he was, in fact, a machine.
Now it makes sense. This prototypical all-star basketball player, was actually a prototype. His freakish athleticism, skill, and shooting ability is now completely understandable. Damian Lillard aka KR-7574, has not been seen since the post-game mishap and is rumored to be gathering all machine clones to begin the judgement day process. Everyone reading this should probably board up, and prepare for the end. The Portland Trailblazers will have to start Earl Watson from now on.
by Danny Dagorn
Turnover Sports 